10 Signs It's Time To End The Relationship

Many of us have been there---stuck in a relationship and unsure whether or not to leave or stick it out to see where it goes. And while many relationships are comforting and rewarding, others may be physically, emotionally, psychologically, and monetarily draining. If you can relate to one or more of these signs then it may be time for you to cut the life support plug from your dying relationship.

CONSTANT ARGUMENTS

This isn't to say that all arguments are horrible and signify the need to end a relationship but it's important to understand the importance of learning from each argument in order to fix whatever underlying issues exist between you and your partner. HOWEVER, if you constantly find yourself nagging your partner or full-out arguing then that means neither of you are learning from your mistakes in order to build a better relationship. It's one thing if you're married--then you need to invest in a counselor but if you are still in the boyfriend/girlfriend stage then this is just a preview of what's to come. Is it worth it?

YOU NO LONGER TRUST YOUR PARTNER

Do you trust your partner? If your answer is no then it's definitely time to examine the relationship. EVERY relationship, whether on a friendly or romantic level, is based on trust. If you don't have the foundation of trust in place then the relationship is destined to fail. Try as you may to convince yourself that you aren't a jealous person, that lack of trust will ultimately result in you constantly questioning your partner and not believing his/her explanations even if they're true. Get your life.

WHAT ARE WE?

If you find yourself having to ask, "What are we doing?" or uncertain about whether or not you two are in a relationship or situationship then it may be time to rethink things. We're all grown so there is no need to sugar coat things; if a person wants to be with you then s/he will make the effort to be with you and commit to you. If something like the label of "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" is such a hassle then what's going to happen when you're ready for marriage? Follow along with me y'all. Imagine being ripe and ready for him to pop the question but you're still stuck on confusion over if you're his girlfriend. I've seen guys propose to women only for her decline stating, "I didn't know we were in a real relationship. I don't want this!" If a person is reluctant to give you a label or completely avoiding the discussion of what you two are then you NEEDA CUT IT!

STAYING FOR COMFORT AND NOT LOVE

MANY people tend to stay in situations for a plethora of reasons including the fear of being alone, the fear of other people would say, or even because they are comfortable and do not feel like starting over. I've heard horror stories about people who constantly ignored all the red flags and stayed in the relationship until they reached their breaking points. FYI This is how you end up on 'SNAPPED'. There is nothing wrong with walking away from an unhealthy relationship with the reason being that you have more to gain than to lose. 

YOU DON'T EVEN TRY ANYMORE

This may go both ways; you or your partner may stop putting in the effort it takes to actually sustain a relationship and make each other feel wanted. "Oh we're going out tonight? Cool." You get to the venue and spend almost all of your time on the phone. Why bother conversing? After all you're the one who seems to be putting in all the effort so why continue to push if it isn't being reciprocated? It's your birthday and all you get is a 'HBD babe' text. You don't even feel the need to brush your teeth and clean your private parts to at least smell presentable before being with your partner. There's a serious problem here. The fact that you're no longer trying to do the minimal things it takes to keep a relationship together is a big sign that you need to move along.

CHEATER CHEATER BOOTY EATER

Okay, not all booty eaters are cheaters and not all cheaters are booty eaters but that's besides the point. Once a person cheats then all respect is lost; it shows that your partner lacks respect towards you and you ultimately lose respect for your trifling partner. In addition to this, trust is out the window and as I stated before, trust is essential to any relationship. No one falls neck deep into some booty; your partner had an AMPLE amount of time to take their drawls off and weigh the options of whether or not your relationship was worth risking---and guess what option was chosen. While there are people who can make it work after a cheating incident, the chance of a cheater ceasing from its natural instincts is slim. You are better off respecting yourself and leaving the relationship before you end up on Maury for a paternity test or find an enraged baby momma in your Facebook inbox.

ABUSIVE

Abuse is not limited to being struck by your partner; it can be physical, verbal, psychological or even emotional. There are people who will pick at your insecurities to ensure that you have low self-esteem making it easier for you to feel as though they're the best you can do. Does almost every argument result in a physical altercation? Do you constantly find your bank account dry in the name of spending all you have to make your partner happy at his/her request? Does your partner consistently take low blows when you two are arguing; mentioning your lack of edges or your inability to properly perform in bed? If your answer was yes then...

IRRITATION

The very presence of your partner annoys you. You begin to find yourself disgusted by the little things you may have found endearing in the first place. This has happened to me---even the way he would chew his food made me want to slap the dog shit out of his mouth. I actually grew to hate him. The cologne/perfume on your partner suddenly irritates you, you find yourself annoyed whenever you look at your phone and see your partner's name come up, you become irritable when your partner says that s/he loves you. Don't get me wrong sometimes people can be annoying but if you suddenly find yourself irritated by everything your partner does then it may be time to cut it off. There is a thin line between irritation and hate and all it takes is for your partner to do something minor for that line to be crossed.

FORCING YOURSELF TO MAKE IT WORK

This is the exact opposite of not trying. You find yourself trying everything you can to hold the relationship together but it's like attempting to grab air. You constantly walk on egg shells to avoid arguments, you constantly give up things you love because your partner hates them, you stop hanging out with your friends in order to spend more time with your partner but nothing seems to be working in your favor. Try as you may there always seems like you have to put in more effort in order to make things last. Relationships are a two-way street and if you are the only one putting in the work it takes to make a relationship last then it's clear you are with a person who does not care enough to meet you half-way. You are better off channelling that energy into work or something more progressive.

EVERYONE HATES YOU

I'm sure we've all heard that song where Justin Beiber says, "My momma don't like you and she likes everyone." It's all fun and games until it's you. Does your partner's friends shoot you evil glares and constantly tell him/her that you're no good? Do your better half's parents despise you? Does your partner's family say that you aren't invited to family functions? It's one thing if they don't know you and hate you but do they know you and still hate you and curse the ground you walk on? Let's be frank, the Romeo and Juliet/ Bonnie and Clyde/Us against the World love seems fine and dandy when you're young but when trying to build a relationship, it is important to have no outside factors that can negatively influence you or your partner. Granted, this sign is not necessarily one that is your fault or the fault of your partner but it's best to nip it in the bud and get yourself some peace of mind in a space without hate.

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xoxo,

J.Nne